Evangelist Pat Robertson is always good for a laugh, now and again.
This time, he's predicting a major attack on the USA this year, one that
will cause massive numbers of deaths. He further says that God told him
about it, which makes it a prophecy.
Well, you'd think that if God said it, it's gonna happen. Oddly
enough, though, Pat's revelations from his deity seem to fall flat about
half the time. He missed on the big hurricane thing, and missed on
Social Security reform.
I don't know for sure, but I'm thinking that the voices in Pat's head
aren't coming from God, so much. There's medication for that, Pat.
1/3/07
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Oh, it's tempting. It's not every day that a sitting U.S. Senator's
aged father is busted for a public sex act. And right here in Saint
Paul. But...I'm going to leave this alone, and wish everyone else would,
too.
Had this been anyone else, we'd never have heard of it. I listen to a
police scanner while I'm working, and there's a call about some public
sex act like this almost every day. Do these make the paper? Nope.
But let one of the cavorters be the 80-something father of a U. S.
Senator, and it's news worldwide. That's just not right. I'm not a
big fan of Norm's, but he had nothing to do with this sad incident. I'm
sure he's embarrassed by it. I'm even more sure that his father is even
more embarrassed.
Let's just let this one pass, OK?
7/27/06
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The City of Minneapolis is thinking about taking strong measures to
crack down on a crime wave in the city with a new ordinance.
No...this isn't about the current wave of murders in North
Minneapolis. It's about spray paint. Like most cities, Minneapolis has a
problem with graffiti, and that rhymes with baked ziti, and that stands
for "behind the counter."
The plan is to force all sellers of spray paint in the city to put
the dangerous stuff behind the counter or in locked cabinets. No more
browsing through the cans of Rustoleum™ at the local hardware store.
Gone are the days of taking a piece of something and trying to match the
color on the spray paint shelves. Nope, now you'll have to go up to the
counter, get an employee to unlock the cabinet and stand there looking
over your shoulder as you nervously check the cans. Or, worse, that
insidious paint will be behind the counter, where you can barely read
it, much less check the label to see if the paint you're considering is
suitable for spraying on outdoor furniture.
If this ordinance is enacted, every shopkeeper who sells the stuff is
going to have to invest big money in either remodeling his cash wrap
counters or in installing long rows of locked glass display cases, at
about $150 per foot. Many will simply discontinue selling the stuff
altogether, making it almost impossible to get that can of paint to
spray your kid's rusty bike.
Well, here's the deal: It's already against the law to sell spray
paint to people under 18. No cigarettes and no spray paint. Even now,
kids hang out near the hardware store, sidling up to adults and saying,
"Hey, mister. Could you buy me a can of Blaze Orange Rustoleum?"
It happens to me every day, you betcha.
Seriously, folks, all this proposed ordinance will do is make things
more inconvenient for responsible adults and for shopkeepers. My
suggestion is that the Minneapolis cops work a little harder at cutting
down on gang activity in the city, since that's the impetus for the graffiti
in the first place. It might even work towards slowing the murder rate
in the city. Ya think?
7/26/06
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Need a laugh? The Twin Cities Metro area has several comedy clubs,
where you'll find stand-up on tap, along with the beverages of your
choice. Check out this CityPages
Listing for locations and links to their schedules.
The Metro also sports some pretty bizarre comic theater. From
scolding nuns to broad humor poking fun at Minnesota's Scandinavian
heritage, check out this list.
Brave New Workshop
Old Log Theater
Stevie Ray's Improv Company
Plymouth Playhouse
Chanhassen Dinner Theaters
The Mystery Cafe
Oops Dinner Theater
06/05/06
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Me!
Minnesota's a hunting and fishing state, and there are taxidermists
in just about every town large enough to have a gas station and
convenience store. A guy wants a permanent record of the hunt or of the
fishing trip, of course.
Minnesota also sports the most bizarre taxidermist I've ever seen.
Sarina Brewer, of Custom
Creature Taxidermy Arts, takes taxidermy to new levels...levels
unseen on the walls of the average suburban home. I'm talking truly
strange stuff.
Perhaps you'd like a mummified cat? You can get one from Ms. Brewer
for just $345. Siamese Twin squirrels? Why not. $800-$100 will get you a
custom pair, made just for you. Pickled Pets? There's an entire page of
them, splendid in their jars of formalin.
You can have custom jewelry made. Imagine how you'll look with a
"mystery hand" ( probably a squirrel or muskrat paw) dangling
from your wrist or neck. For the adventurous, the bizarre
"Screaming Head" necklace, will set you back just $45.
Need the odd skull, some dried squirrel tails, or or a dozen or so
dried squirrel heads to get started in your own artistic enterprise?
They're right there on this site, and the prices won't frighten you.
What might frighten you, or small children near you, are the various
"Carcass Art" depictions, using preserved animal
carcasses in carefully posed scenes.
Sound unbelievable? You've got to see this site for yourself. Click
here for a truly gut-wrenching adventure. Who knows? You might find
that perfect gift for that special someone in your life. Or, perhaps,
you have a strange little bend in your psyche of your own. It's all an
example of what Minnesota can be.
5/26/06
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Me!
